(Discuss this quiz, your answers, and anything else JW-related at jehovahs-witness.com.)
You are 27% Jehovah’s Witness!
You have some serious changes to make before you can be baptized as a Jehovah’s Witness. Your attitude will likely get you labeled as a rebel. Parents will not encourage their children to hang around you or your children, unless there is reason to believe they can help you become a better Jehovah’s Witness. It is unlikely that you will ever really fit in at the Kingdom Hall.
— Your answers and some commentary follow —
How do you view the Bible?
100% inspired by God
The Jehovah’s Witnesses completely agree with you! Perhaps you’ll fit in! Read on to see.
What is the most important quality you look for in a church leader?
You may be disappointed at the Kingdom Hall. While the Bible is opened frequently during the five weekly meetings, it is only to read from a select set of scriptures. Matthew 24:14 is used to show the need to preach, and it is looked up and read over and over, often multiple times in the same meeting. JW leaders have doctrinal knowledge, but little solid Bible knowledge.
How often do you feel like attending church?
Once a week
I’m afraid you’d have to increase your appetite for church attendance. Jehovah’s Witnesses have five mandatory meetings a week, usually combined into three days. If you regularly miss any of them, you would be viewed as “weak”. You wouldn’t have many friends, since none of them would want you to drag them down. Attending only on Sundays would definitely get you labelled as an outsider.
How much of your time do you spend in recreational/family activities?
Yeah, you’re going to want to cut this way back. Between meetings, preparing for meetings, studying Watchtower books with your family, preaching to your neighbors, cleaning the Kingdom Hall, reading magazines, reading the new books released each year, and reading the “Yearbook of Jehovah’s Witnesses”, you’re not going to have time for these recreational things. Maybe your spouse could drive to the meetings, and you could take up macrame?
What kind of vehicle do you drive?
Motorcycle (der findes ingen cykler i testen…)
No good Jehovah’s Witness drives a motorcycle. Some Jehovah’s Witnesses do it anyway, but don’t look for them to be leaders in the church. People on motorcycles are viewed as rebellious, and are probably not approved by God for risking their lives in this way. You’ll need to get rid of your bike to fit in among Jehovah’s Witnesses.
How do you feel about people controlling who your friends are?
It’s none of their business
Among Jehovah’s Witnesses there is very little that is ‘none of their business’. This would be considered an attitude problem that you would need to work out of yourself as you ‘put on the new personality’. Before you could be accepted among Jehovah’s Witnesses, you would need to be willing to let them control who you associate with, what movies you see, what books you read, and even what sorts of intimacy you enjoy with your spouse.
How important are your family members to you? (Mother, brothers, cousins)
This could be a problem. If your family members are not Jehovah’s Witnesses, you will be discouraged from spending much time with them. If you do spend time with them, you’ll be expected to preach to them about your new faith as much as possible. If they are currently Jehovah’s Witnesses, then you may be in for trouble if you ever decide the Kingdom Hall is not for you. If you join, then leave, they will not be allowed to speak to you ever again.
How important is it to you to have the respect of your community?
Very important, I work on my reputation
Your reputation will likely take a hit if you become one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Charity giving and volunteer community work is discouraged, as it impinges on time spent in the door-to-door ministry and money that could be donated to the Watchtower. While they encourage good morals, you probably have those already. So you will appear to become more reclusive, less approachable, and your constant preaching about Jehovah’s Kingdom will cause people to avoid you. The Kingdom Hall may not be the place for you.
You view holidays as opportunities to:
Reunite with old friends and family
Jehovah’s Witnesses view all holidays as inherently bad. There are different objections to different holidays, but in the end they are all considered inappropriate. Since Jehovah’s Witnesses will discourage you from spending time with your relatives anyway, they will certainly not accept you spending holidays with them. If this is truly important to you, then the Kingdom Hall is not going to work.
If all your friends stopped talking to you because you changed churches, you would think:
“This is so un-Christian!”
Jehovah’s Witnesses believe that they are the only true Christians on the Earth today. As such, any doctrine they teach is the correct Christian doctrine — all others are false. They believe that their ‘shunning’ doctrine (called “disfellowshipping”) is a loving provision from their God, Jehovah, and they are “helping” people to see the errors of their ways and return to God by shunning them. If you don’t agree with this practice, you should not become one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.
Måske er jeg blevet lidt mere glad over, at jeg ikke er Jehovads Vidne oven på denne test… Dog vil jeg stadig bruge tid på at vise dem Guds Ord frem for at “bare” afvise dem ved min dør.